Monthly Archives: March 2014

Thank You

God doesn’t always come when you think you need Him, but He’s always right on time.

Two years ago today, I met a man who would change my life forever.  After I ended my engagement in January 2012, I decided that I needed to focus on my relationship with God and my relationship with myself.  I wasn’t looking for love–in fact, I had sworn off men altogether.  But God orders your steps according to His will, not yours.  And on March 24, 2012, I received one of the biggest blessings of my life.

As part of my fresh new start, I had packed up my belongings and hired a local moving company to help me get settled into a new apartment.  One of the movers engaged me in conversation, politely offering to show me around Madison sometime.  As he was leaving, I gave him a business card with my cell number on the back.  He called me as soon as he got back into the moving truck.  🙂  And now, two years later, our relationship remains.

There are so many reasons why I love him.  He’s hilarious, but isn’t afraid to have a serious conversation.  He’s hardworking and generous.  He’s strong.  He’s brave.  He’s a great son and an even better father.  He’s ambitious and isn’t afraid to go after his dreams.  He makes me feel beautiful.  He teaches me something new about the world every single day.  And though we’ve had our ups and downs, he’s still here loving me exactly the way I am…even when I don’t love myself.

Every day that we wake up next to each other is a good day.  We talk about our future together all the time–the business we’ll own and the trips we’ll take.  But I really don’t care what we’re doing, as long as we’re doing it together and for the glory of God.

So to my Bae, thank you for these two years together.  Thank you for all the sacrifices you’ve made (and I know there have been a lot of them).  Thank you for staying and fighting for us.  And most of all, thank you for showing up to work that day.  🙂

At "prom" in 2012.

At “prom” in 2012.

At a friend's wedding in 2014.

At a friend’s wedding in 2014.

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Naturally Made

Naturally Made

Everywhere I go, I see more and more Black women who’ve embraced their natural hair texture and stopped chemically straightening their hair. I’ve been natural for a few years now and I love it! When I look in the mirror, I finally see me. But I haven’t always felt this way.

I can remember sitting in our kitchen getting my hair hot combed–and my ears burned–until I was able to “graduate” to a Just for Me relaxer when I turned five. The relaxers left me with scalp burns, limp strands, and sometimes even hair loss. But straight hair was “pretty” and what girl doesn’t want to feel pretty? As a little black girl in a mostly white town, all I wanted was the long, straight hair my classmates had. When I moved to Wisconsin, my biggest priority wasn’t finding an apartment but finding a hair salon so I wouldn’t miss a relaxer.

But that was then, and this is now. Now I know that beautiful comes in all hair textures, and I’ve embraced mine. Natural hair definitely takes work and I respect that some women choose to continue relaxing. But God makes no mistakes; all of His children are beautifully and wonderfully made–hair included.

This curly ‘do was achieved after a couple of weeks of flat ironing (which loosened my naturally curl pattern quite a bit) and two-strand twisting. More details on my naturally hair routine coming in a future post, so stay tuned!

This carnival ride…

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A few days ago, I got word that my aunt (my father’s sister) passed away.

As a child, I spent a lot of time with my father’s side of the family—summertime barbecues, holiday gatherings.  After my parent’s divorce, those weekends and holidays became less frequent.  It shames me to say this, but I hadn’t seen my aunt in years–probably since my father’s funeral in 2000.  There are occasional phone calls from my paternal grandmother, but I’m not close with them like I am with my mom’s side of the family.  

Thanks to Facebook, I was able to keep up with my aunt’s progress even though I couldn’t see her in person.  She had been sick for some time–close to death at least once–but her passing came as a surprise.  I spoke with my grandmother this morning on the phone and she just kept saying, “She was doing so well…”  I guess this is a true testament that God calls us home in His time.

Sometimes tragedy is the catalyst that families need to come closer together.  Who knows if my aunt’s passing will change the way I interact with my father’s side of the family, but it is a definite reminder that life is precious–we only get one go on this carnival ride called life, so make sure yours is one to remember.