Tag Archives: family

That Was Her Way

Posted in family by

One year ago today, my great-aunt Aloma passed away.  Known to me as Granny Loma, she played a recurring role in my childhood.  In summers she hosted far-flung relatives and Independence Day barbecues.  The other seasons felt her presence too; Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas parties, Easter Egg hunts in the field behind her house.  You could stop by whenever to talk to her, and she always had something to say–and no qualms about saying it either.

On my trips back home after moving to Madison, she was the one I made a point to visit.  She made sure I left with a wise word and a joke (and frequently a strawberry shortcake, my favorite of her desserts).  She called me when my mother and I argued to make sure I understood my mother’s perspective and hers too–protect your children, guard your family.  Let them learn but never leave them lonely.  Tell them the truth but understand their lives are their own.

She was the type of woman that spoke her mind without hesitation–there was never a question of how she felt or what she thought.  She had five kids of her own and helped raised everyone else’s too.  When she told you to do something, you did it (and heaven forbid if she had to tell you twice).  She lived in big t-shirts and white tennis shoes.  Her hair was always flawless.  She sang beautifully and loved the Lord with all her heart.  She was the matriarch of our family, our center of gravity.

I told myself I should ask more questions while she was here, but the opportunities passed; the moments slipped by.  Of course now more than ever I want to know her yellow cake recipe, how to can vegetables, what it felt like to to be a wife at 14.  The things I took for granted as a college student, juggling classes with work and extracurriculars, interest me most in my new day of home and career.  The answers I look everywhere to find were five minutes away on Tanner Rd. all this time.

Somewhere–in the warmest, friendliest corner of Heaven, Granny Loma is preparing a feast to welcome us when we join her.  To give of all of us–her husband, children, grandchildren, siblings, nieces, nephews, and anyone who needs it–a warm smile, a big hug, and words of truth spoken with heartfelt sincerity.  That was her way.

Sept. 13, 1942-April 2, 2013

Sept. 13, 1942 – April 2, 2013

This carnival ride…

Posted in Uncategorized by

A few days ago, I got word that my aunt (my father’s sister) passed away.

As a child, I spent a lot of time with my father’s side of the family—summertime barbecues, holiday gatherings.  After my parent’s divorce, those weekends and holidays became less frequent.  It shames me to say this, but I hadn’t seen my aunt in years–probably since my father’s funeral in 2000.  There are occasional phone calls from my paternal grandmother, but I’m not close with them like I am with my mom’s side of the family.  

Thanks to Facebook, I was able to keep up with my aunt’s progress even though I couldn’t see her in person.  She had been sick for some time–close to death at least once–but her passing came as a surprise.  I spoke with my grandmother this morning on the phone and she just kept saying, “She was doing so well…”  I guess this is a true testament that God calls us home in His time.

Sometimes tragedy is the catalyst that families need to come closer together.  Who knows if my aunt’s passing will change the way I interact with my father’s side of the family, but it is a definite reminder that life is precious–we only get one go on this carnival ride called life, so make sure yours is one to remember. 

God Stopped and Took Notice

Posted in Uncategorized by

This weekend, my great-grandmother (known to me as Grandmommy) passed away.  She was 88 years old; her health had declined over the years.  Though we knew she was in ill health, the news of her death still came as a shock to me.  

As a young child, I spent a large part of my time at her house on Henley Hill Rd.  A small trailer home at the end of the lane, my cousin Cedrick and I spent as much time outdoors as in.  I remember vividly Cedrick teaching me how to ride a bike on the gravel driveway in front of her house–my legs still bear the scars from my failed attempts.  Grandmommy taught me a thing or two as well, such as how good luck can be brought on my unexpected events…like the bird that pooped on my leg while sitting at a picnic table in her tree-shaded yard wasn’t gross, it was a sign of good fortune.  She had a hard time convincing Cedrick of that fact when a bird pooped on his head in her yard though.

Her kitchen held Shredded Wheat cereal–the big sugarless bricks, not the cute frosted squares–and a deep freezer with a seemingly endless supply of orange, cherry, and grape popsicles from the Schwann man.  Her television was a huge, wood-framed thing.  She always attended church and was a fixture in the choir.

A few weeks ago, I was going through an old box and found the card she gave me for graduating college in 2009.  For my radio broadcasting internship in college, I billed myself as “Ashley Maxine” in tribute to her.  I don’t think she knew that when she congratulated me on getting my college degree, but I hope she appreciates our memories of her and how we’ll honor her now that she’s with our Heavenly Father.

I imagine that my Uncle Bernest and Granny ‘Loma greeted her with a song at the gates of Heaven.  Her husband and daughter (Grandaddy Babes and Aunt Donna) weren’t too far behind.  She’s probably singing praises so loudly that God has no choice but to stop and take notice, just as we did all those Sundays in church.