Somehow, I lost my ability to dream.
I’m not talking about the dreams we have when we sleep—I still have plenty of those. (Honestly, my nighttime dreams are so active sometimes I wake up still tired.) I’m talking about dreams for myself, my life, the person I want to be.
When I was a kid, I used to dream I’d be a famous actress making movies in Hollywood.
As a young adult, I dreamed of becoming an executive at my company helping to make change for sick people around the world.
I even had dreams for this blog, that it would blow up into my own lifestyle brand where I inspired all sorts of people to be the best versions of themselves.
But somewhere along the way, I stopped dreaming. You know what?That’s actually not true at all. I didn’t stop dreaming…
…I just stopped believing my dreams could actually come true.
How do you find the courage to dream again? How do you find the hope when you’ve lost it? How do you dare imagine a better future when the present day beats you down so thoroughly?
I truly don’t know. I wake up every day and go to sleep every night and just continue through the motions. I tell myself I’m stuck, there’s nothing else than what is now. Be grateful for what I have and never wish for anything more.
I am grateful for what I have, no doubt about it. But I want to allow myself to dream of more again. I want to rediscover that version of me who was convinced she’d make an impact on the world.
So I’m back on the blog after almost a year of inactivity. Maybe this blog won’t turn into anything at all. Maybe nobody cares a rip about what I have to say.
But hey, a girl can dream.