Day 96: Dog-sitting makes me happy. My boyfriend planned an out of town trip, so he asked me to watch his dog while he was away. Luckily his dog and I have lots in common (specifically, a love of snacks and napping). I don’t think I’m ready for a dog of my own yet, but being a temporary dog mom has been fun. Check out a few photos of some of our adventures!
Enjoying a long walk!
Watching a rabbit. See it? (Look in the upper right corner of the picture!)
Day 97: Company picnics make me happy. My company goes all out when it comes to our annual picnic. Earlier this week I volunteered to help with pre-picnic stuff (more on that here) and the end result was spectacular! Here are some pics of (just one side!) of our celebration:
Day 98: Catching up with friends makes me happy. My friend Judith was in town this weekend, so we met up for brunch at one of my favorite restaurants. We met through a work opportunity and became fast friends! Even though she no longer lives in Madison, we make a point to keep in touch. It was awesome catching up with her in person!
Day 99: Free lunch makes me happy. Today was staff meeting day and the wrap (sweet chili tofu) was so good! It tasted even better because it was free. 🙂
Day 100: Taking classes makes me happy. This week, I get to take a class instead of teach a class! I absolutely love learning and am thrilled to be the one being taught this time around.
Also…today is my last entry for #100HappyDays. This was a fantastic exercise in gratitude! Taking a step back and finding something to celebrate in every day–no matter how small–helped me to put my life in perspective and realize I’ve been blessed with an amazing life. Honestly, some days it was hard for me to come up with something more than “Waking up this morning makes me happy.” Not every day will be filled with joy–that much is certain. But I found that the happy moments outweigh the unhappy ones overall, and that’s pretty good to me.
Day 90: Wedding receptions make me happy. My boyfriend invited me to the reception of one of his good friends. We had a great time! My boyfriend was so handsome in his suit and meeting his friends was really fun.
Day 91: Experiencing new music makes me happy. My boyfriend is really into the Grateful Dead, and a documentary about the group came out recently on Amazon Prime, so we watched it. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. I never knew too much about the Dead–basically that it was “hippie” music and Jerry Garcia was involved–so I liked learning more about the group and the music they made.
Day 92: Coaching others makes me happy. I’m part of a group that helps trainers improve their adult education skills, and I had a 1:1 session with one of my colleagues today. We focused on determining if trainees “got it”–she really wanted to make sure that trainees were understanding the information she taught them. It was really fun to look at another class and find ways to make the information stick.
Day 93: Surprise packages make me happy. Imagine my surprise when I go to the mailbox and see a package from my friend Kathy! She sent me a favor from her baby shower and lots of other goodies as an early birthday present. She’s into fashion and makeup, so I’m excited to try the cosmetics she included in the box. Yay for great friends!
I can’t wait to try out this stuff!
Day 59: Getting things in the mail makes me happy.
Quick clarification: Getting things in the mail that aren’t bills makes me happy. 😉 I ordered some pictures to hang up in my home and they finally arrived! For so long, my walls have been bare. But my boyfriend’s recent home decorating inspired me to do a little decorating myself. Family, friends, travels, and of course my favorite drag queens–I’m covering the walls with them!
Looks like I’m gonna need to do some thrifting to find frames for all these (and the ones I still need to order)…
Yes, the picture of me with RuPaul is an 8×10. To quote Queen B, “And I don’t feel bad about it.”
Days 40-41: New cars make me happy! It’s my great pleasure to introduce…Stella. She’s a 2017 Subaru Crosstrek and she’s ALL MINE. She’s stylish and, most importantly, good for these Wisconsin winters. Last winter I got stuck in a (pretty shallow) ditch and had to be towed out–I’m hoping Stella will get me out of those sticky situations if they arise in the future.
Day 42: Anniversaries make me happy. One year ago, my boyfriend and I went on our first date. We’ve been together ever since, and I am so grateful for him. He lets me be me, which is something I’ve never had in a relationship. We make a great team and I’m looking forward to spending many more years with him!
Day 43: Doing new workouts makes me happy. Each month, my trainer comes up with a new set of exercises for our sessions. I really like learning new stuff, so this is always a fun time for me. I’m sure my trainer gets tired of my constant questions about what muscles will be worked and if my technique is good though.
Day 44: Coworkers who are also friends make me happy. Imagine my surprise when I go to leave for work and my garage door wouldn’t open! I couldn’t get it open manually and had to be at work at 8am, so I called my officemate. She came to pick me up and I truly appreciated it! She is an awesome person to work with and also a good friend, which is a tough combination to find sometimes.
Day 45: Teaching camp makes me happy. I’ve been teaching classes to internal staff this week–we call them “camps”–and I have really enjoyed this group of campers. They ask great questions and even laugh at my corny jokes. 🙂
Apparently, I’m rude.
I mean, I didn’t even curse! No personal insults or attacks. Not even an angry emoji or two. Just a single iMessage after multiple disappointments:
“I said before I want a friendship with someone who has time and energy to hang out with me. I don’t think that is you. Best of luck in the future, but do not contact me again.”
In the words of Queen Bey “you must not know ’bout me” because, baby–I can show you rude if you really wanna see it. I purposefully waited a day before responding because my original response was hella rude.
He must have also conveniently forgotten that his rude behavior caused this reaction. I mean, he was the one who:
- Disappeared for MONTHS after our first date–no phone call, text, telegram, smoke signal, NOTHING.
- Randomly popped back into my life expecting me to forget I hadn’t heard from him in literally five months. He asked me if he could “make it up to me” which he did by…
- Continuously made sexual innuendos and constantly commented on my body, which made me extremely uncomfortable. (When I asked him to stop, he said he would “back off.” I didn’t ask you to back off, sir. I asked you to STOP.)
- Touched my hair without my permission. Like, not just a pat–his hands were IN MY HAIR. (To his credit, he stopped when I asked, but please don’t touch me without my permission. That is very, very rude.)
- Telling me he didn’t feel like making the drive to see me (after I drove to see him the last time we hung out) and making plans with me, but cancelling the day of because his “night kinda disappeared with a bunch of stuff.” <~~~WTF does that even mean?
So, sir–if being up front about not wanting inconsistent people in my life is rude, then I don’t want to be polite.
This weekend, I attended a few events and had a wonderful time. I laughed, ate delicious food, and shared the company of wonderful people. I left feeling on top of the world.
Later, not so much.
I have this problem with analyzing myself–being hyper critical. Rarely in the moment, but always afterward. A mental magnifying glass, scrutinizing every word, move, thought. Wondering if I was too loud. Too honest. If they liked me. If they didn’t…usually followed by things I should or shouldn’t have said, did or shouldn’t have done.
My guess is this comes from a lifetime of feeling less than. Not pretty enough, or smart enough, or talented enough. Constantly striving to present a perfect image so people wouldn’t see how broken I was inside.
That’s no way to live. And I won’t live that way anymore.
One of my goals is to care a little less about what other people think, accept my flaws, and love myself unconditionally. I cannot control the opinions of others, so there is no point in stressing over and worrying about them. As long as I’m the best person I can be–honest, friendly, empathetic, funny, kind–that’s all I can do.
I love me and–if these are the people meant to be in my life–they will too.