Tag Archives: stress

The Power of Now: Actionable Tips for Living Your Best Life (from guest blogger Melissa Howard)

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Photo by Freepik

In an era where life’s pace never seems to slow, finding your path to personal excellence might appear formidable. Yet, it’s the incremental changes to our everyday habits that can dramatically shift our trajectory toward success and fulfillment. This guide from Deep Curves Ahead provides actionable steps you can take to enhance your well-being, nurture personal growth, and achieve your aspirations.

The Essential Role of Quality Sleep

The cornerstone of a productive and fulfilling day begins with a good night’s sleep. Adequate rest is paramount, not merely for physical rejuvenation but for mental sharpness and emotional balance as well. When you commit to 7-9 hours of quality sleep nightly, you lay the groundwork for enhanced focus, improved mood regulation, and overall physical health. It’s the fuel that powers your ability to confront daily challenges with vigor and resilience.

Navigate Stress with Grace

The presence of stress in our lives is a given, yet its impact is determined by our management of it. Identifying stress triggers and embracing coping mechanisms such as mindfulness practices, deep breathing exercises, and self-care rituals, transform stress from a hindrance into a catalyst for growth. This proactive approach to stress management not only alleviates immediate tension but also fortifies your resilience against future stressors.

Find Renewal Through Deep Cleaning

A cluttered environment often mirrors a cluttered mind, where both can significantly hinder your ability to focus and manifest your goals. Committing to a deep cleaning of your living space not only refreshes your surroundings but also declutters your mental landscape. Make this process easier by unearthing cleaning hacks and tips from reputable online sources. This act of renewal invites creativity, enhances focus, and cultivates a serene environment conducive to personal growth and productivity.

Become a Better Communicator

The art of communication is a pivotal tool in building and maintaining successful relationships. By enhancing your ability to listen actively, express yourself assertively, and extend empathy, you deepen your connections and navigate conflicts with ease. These communication skills are instrumental in cultivating a supportive network and advancing collaborative efforts, both personally and professionally.

Embrace Organization In All Aspects of Your Life

A well-organized life is a foundation for efficiency and clarity. Developing systematic routines and employing organizational tools like planners and digital applications streamline your daily tasks, thereby freeing up time for growth-oriented activities. This strategic approach not only minimizes stress but also aligns your daily actions with your overarching goals, ensuring steady progress toward your aspirations.

Use Your Vacation Time 

Embracing the full potential of your vacation time can be a transformative experience, not just a break from your daily routine. Instead of letting those precious days go unused, plan trips that you’ve long dreamed about. Whether it’s exploring the hidden gems within your own state, discovering the diverse cultures and landscapes across your country, or venturing into the vast and varied terrains of the world, each journey offers a unique opportunity for personal growth and enrichment. Traveling broadens your horizons, exposes you to new ideas, and fosters a deeper understanding of the world and your place in it.

Go Back to School to Boost Your Career

Going back to school is a strategic move for career advancement, and choosing an online degree program adds a layer of convenience and flexibility that can be pivotal for working professionals. For instance, if you’re a nurse, with a master’s of science degree in nursing, you can gain valuable skills designed to equip students with a range of competencies, from advanced patient care to healthcare policy and ethics, all of which are critical in today’s rapidly evolving medical field. The beauty of an online education format is that it allows you to balance your work and family life without compromising on your academic goals.

The path to living your best life is paved with intentional actions and mindful decisions. By embracing these strategies, you’re not merely dreaming of a better tomorrow; you’re actively constructing it. Each day presents a new opportunity to apply these principles, gradually steering your life toward a future brimming with success, fulfillment, and personal achievement. Start today, and with each step, you’ll move closer to realizing the life you envision.

Join the journey at Deep Curves Ahead, where engaging and uplifting stories await to guide and inspire you through life’s twists and turns. 

Heated

Posted in Normal People Things, She. Me. Her., That's What the World Is Today, Work Life by

What do you complain about the most?

I don’t really think of myself as a “complainer.”

I’m the type of gal to try to make the most of any situation. I say I “go with the flow” though my therapist might call it “conflict avoidant” haha. But I truly don’t have much to complain about in life.

However, one thing chaps my ass so much I’ll actually speak up about it:

If you say you’re going to do something, DO IT.

Nothing irritates me more than a flaky person. The old folks called it “sometimey.” You say one thing, then do another. Behaving this way is a guaranteed method to get my attention (and not in a positive way).

Perhaps I feel this way because I try really hard to keep my commitments. My mother DID NOT PLAY about keeping commitments! Anytime I wanted to sign up for a new activity or team, she would always say, “If you agree to this, you see it through the whole season/year/production/whatever. You don’t have to do it ever again after that, but people are depending on you. If you make this commitment, you keep it.”

So you can imagine how, after a lifetime of keeping commitments, it irks me when others don’t do the same. To me, my word is everything. So if you tell me you’ll do something, I will believe you until you show me otherwise. Therefore…

If you can no longer do a thing, SAY SOMETHING.

I know life happens. Sometimes things don’t go as planned. So if I can’t keep a commitment, I’ll let you know as far in advance as I can (and expect you to do the same). Don’t have people out here counting on you and then just leave them hanging—that is disrespectful and rude.

So be honest. Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Keep the promises you do make. Let folks know if situations change.

Then maybe we’ll all have a bit less to complain about!

Tangled Up in Me

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Where can you reduce clutter in your life?

Since I was a child, I’ve always had a lot of “stuff.” School papers, books, knickknacks, stuffed animals—if I received it, I kept it. To this day, my mother expresses amazement at the system of organized chaos I maintained. Yes, my room was a mess, but that mess was cataloged (and if you messed with my mess I would definitely notice).

As an adult, I’m still inclined to keep things but to a significantly smaller extent. These days I hang onto sentimental stuff: cards, photos, ticket stubs, items that are typically smaller and easier to store. I actually competed a project last month to reorganized all my mementos; they are now separated by phase of life, tucked away in labeled bins for easy reference in the future. (How very Virgo of me, spending my hard earned vacation time on home organization projects haha.)

Nowadays, the mental clutter requires more attention than the physical. I struggle so hard with letting memories go…especially when they hurt. The rejections, the embarrassments, the dismissals, the failures, the missed opportunities—all of them live rent-free in my brain and they love making their presence known.

I understand our brains do lots of wild stuff because of evolution; they are hard wired to protect us from danger and memory is part of that. But what I don’t understand is why I can’t purge some of this mental clutter. Why I hold onto it, pull it off the shelf, and examine it so often (even when I’d rather be thinking about pretty much anything else.)

It reminds me of a song:

I’m real good at forgiving

But my heart can’t forget

The ache before the mend

Kelly Clarkson, skip this part

I’m pretty good at moving on, but for some reason my brain just refuses to let go of all the hurt.

Maybe this is all for some higher purpose I haven’t realized yet. Or maybe it’s my depression and anxiety playing tricks on me (as they are known to do). Either way, I’d love to clear out some of these old hurts and make room for more positive thoughts.

Sittin’ On Top of the World

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Today was a good day.

I woke up well rested. My workout didn’t (totally) wipe me out.

The class pilot I’ve been stressing out over for a month went swimmingly. I got ahead on not one, but two projects. A colleague gushed over a video series I produced for her; she called the work I thought was basic “amazing.”

The temperature stayed above freezing for most of the day. I tried a new recipe that turned out delicious. The kitchen is clean, supper made enough leftovers for another dinner, and and I’m contentedly watching reruns of The Office with my love.

Today wasn’t spectacular, or life changing. It wasn’t even particularly interesting. But it was such a good day.

In the US, November is seen as a month for gratitude and giving thanks. But too many of us neglect to appreciate the many blessings around us. This is my intention to express gratitude every month, every week, every day of the year.

May we see each day for the beautiful gift it is. May we value each other for the differences that make us unique. May we do our best to make each day a good day for all of us.

Meaning of Life

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What would you do if you lost all your possessions?

Before I share my perspective, I want to acknowledge how privileged I am to have never experienced losing all my possessions. I’ve never known life without clothes on my back, food in my belly, and a place to lay my head and store my belongings. My heart aches for anyone who has ever lost all they owned.

But when I stop to think about what it would be like to lose all my possessions, my mind whispers

free

I admit I am a bit of a pack rat and I hold onto many things that should have been donated or trashed long ago. Just yesterday, I went through my closets and came out with two large bags full of gently used clothes for donation, much of which hadn’t been worn in at least a year.

It sounds so liberating, getting rid of it all. No “I might need this” or “someday I’ll use that”—just starting over with nothing to hold me back. A clean slate.

But all means ALL, doesn’t it?

The wooden figure bought in Bali the day I knew my husband was “the one.”

The birthday cards from my mother through the years, with words of love in her perfect cursive.

The UK memorabilia my daddy collected.

The American flag that laid across his casket.

I would put on a brave face, for sure. But underneath the stoicism and the “things are just things” attitude I would be

devastated

Eventually, I would move on. Time would dull the pain of losing. I’d gather more things.

And hopefully, freedom would come with the understanding that possessions spark memories, and memories can last forever even without the physical token.

So I’ll value my possessions and treat them with care while I have them…

…because I know there may come a day when memories are all that’s left.

This Time

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Oh. My. Goodness. …Am I actually getting my shit together?!?

Short answer: Yes. (FINALLY.)

I know it’s been awhile but I’ve decided to give this blogging thing a try. Again. For the umpteenth time. After OVER A YEAR of crickets on the blog.

It isn’t like I haven’t thought about it, though. I’ve often tried to drum up the inspiration, the energy to write. But it didn’t feel right until now.

You know, one of the reasons I’ve avoided writing here is because this blog chronicles some of the lowest points of my life. Reading the entries reminds me of how broken, how lost and afraid I was. The wounds may have healed a bit over time, but the memories of their infliction never faded.

My goal now is to rediscover my love of writing, explore all the things I’m learning about myself on my journey through therapy, and HEAL. (Not necessarily in that order.)

If I’m lucky, maybe I’ll help some of y’all who are healing too.

Life is full of twists and turns, a road ever winding with deep curves ahead. Some times we find ourselves at dead ends. Other times the path is leisurely, not a pothole or speed bump in sight. The only thing we know for sure is that there is no GPS and we can’t refill our tanks when our fuel finally runs out.

So let’s take this journey.

Let’s hop into the driver’s seat of our lives.

Spark the ignition of hope.

Check the rear view mirror to remember where we came from.

Turn toward the path of growth, peace, joy.

…and hit the gas.

Simple Strategies for Boosting Your Health

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Guest blogger Melissa Howard shares some valuable insight on keeping yourself well as we move into spring:

Making health and wellness a priority isn’t easy. Most adults are overburdened. As a result, they aren’t as likely to make self-care a central focus in their lives. Luckily, there are some simple health-boosting techniques that can fit into even the busiest of schedules. Deep Curves Ahead shares some options below.

Make Time for Sleep
Overall, adults usually need between 7 and 9 hours of quality sleep each night. It gives your body enough time to go through critical processes that keep you healthy, so rest needs to be a priority.

If you experience any signs or symptoms of sleep disorders, such as frequent waking or extreme fatigue during the day, it’s wise to see a medical professional. They can assess your condition and develop a treatment plan, ensuring you can get the rest you need.

Use Stress-Reducing Techniques
Many stress reduction techniques are easy to work into even the busiest of schedules. Meditation and deep breathing can be incredibly effective and can often be done nearly anywhere. Taking a second to watch a funny video is also an excellent option, as a quick laugh can be a natural mood-booster.

For some people, journaling is a great way to keep stress levels down. It lets them vent their frustrations in a safe manner, giving them an outlet. However, writing down what you’re grateful for can also work. With the gratitude approach, you focus on the positive, which can be a better fit for many.

Lastly, take a look at your surroundings and see if your home is cluttered — believe it or not, this could be a major source of stress and anxiety. Not only will cleaning up a bit help alleviate these feelings, but it can also release any negative energy this clutter has trapped in your home.

Examine Your Job
For many people, their careers are a major source of stress. A lack of job satisfaction has a negative impact on your health, so it’s crucial to examine your work situation to see if it’s an issue.

When you’re not feeling challenged at work, boredom can become a problem. If you’re under constant stress, burnout is more likely to be an issue. When a workplace is blatantly toxic, it strains your mental health.

If your job is causing you a significant amount of distress, pivoting into a new career might be a smart move. Online degree programs make heading in a new direction simple. You can keep working and manage family obligations while you acquire new skills, allowing you to maintain a balance.

When you look for an online school, make sure it’s accredited. Additionally, research tuition costs, fee structures, and other related expenses to ensure the pricing is competitive. That way, you can secure a quality education without breaking the bank.

Get Enough Exercise
Exercise is a big part of overall wellness. Not only can it keep you physically fit, but it can also reduce stress, lead to better sleep, alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression, and more.

Most adults need 150 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise each week. Thankfully, it doesn’t have to happen all at once. As long as each session is at least 10 minutes long, you’re meeting the requirement.

Learn to Say ‘No’
In some cases, people struggle with their health because they’re overwhelmed. By learning to say “no,” you can get more control over your workload and personal life.

If you’re asked to accept a task or obligation that you genuinely feel isn’t a smart idea, say “no.” Don’t overburden yourself if it isn’t a genuine necessity or requires you to sacrifice in another critical area of your life. If you do, you can keep your workload manageable, relieving a significant source of stress.

Photo Credit: Pexels

About Melissa:

“Every suicide is preventable. After losing her younger brother to suicide, Melissa Howard felt compelled to create Stop Suicide. By providing helpful resources and articles on her website, she hopes to build a lifeline of information. She went to school at University of Colorado, Colorado Springs and currently works as an executive assistant.”

(Lay Your Head On My) Pillow

Posted in Home Life, Normal People Things, She. Me. Her., Work Life by

“…and just relax, relax, relax…”

I know I can’t be the only one who remembers that groove from Tony! Toni! Toné!. Yes, that song came out when I was, like, 7. No, I didn’t have a clue what they were talking about (there are some pretty adult themes in those lyrics). But hey–I’m a sucker for a good R&B tune! (And if you’ve never heard this song, please give it a listen–it’s awesome.)

You’ve probably figured out I use songs as the titles for my blog posts. Sometimes the songs get stuck in my head for days–they won’t leave until I get my thoughts out. Most times, the songs remind me of a particular feeling…a moment…a memory. Today’s song actually came from a conversation with my therapist.

In a session earlier this week, I shared how overwhelmed I felt–just plain stressed and anxious–with all the changes in my work schedule and obligations in my personal life. After I was done explaining everything, she asked me a question that knocked me right on my ass:

Can you be relaxed on the busiest day of your life?

Now I had to think about this for a minute, because basically my entire life I’ve assumed busy = stressed. I enjoy having things to do; I love staying busy. But I don’t like being stressed the fuck out. (My guess is most people don’t.) My therapist challenged me to relax and not get tense even when I’ve got a lot going on.

So yesterday, even with the stress of work and home, I tried to relax. Instead of worrying about every possible thing that could go wrong, I tried to focus on the present–what was happening in that moment. And the day went surprisingly well! Usually at the end of a work day, I’m dragging myself back to my car–all the stress of the day just weighs on me, so much that it feels like a physical weight.

Yesterday, I left work feeling light as air.

So many of us struggle with anxiety and stress; we weigh ourselves down with worrying and feel we’ll never be able to accomplish everything. If you feel this way, you are absolutely not alone–I’m right there with you. But I’d encourage you to ask yourself that question, “Can I be relaxed on the busiest day of my life?” Allow yourself to see things in perspective–you don’t have to be stressed or anxious just because you are busy. Handle your shit–don’t let your shit handle you.

And just relax…relax…relax.

No More (Baby Imma Do Right)

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“I’m gettin’ a lil’ tired of your broken promises, promises…”

Y’all remember that song??? 3LW had middle school me hype! I was really out there singing (definitely off-key) to my (completely imaginary) boyfriend to get his (entirely hypothetical) shit together. 😂😂😂

Now, those three little women didn’t know what the hell they were singing about either. (Or maybe they were more sophisticated young adults than I was—who knows?) Either way, I appreciate the message behind the song in a way I couldn’t back then.

Sometimes, we stay in situations we know aren’t good for us. Whether it’s a job or a relationship or something else entirely, we stay because we feel comfortable. We stay because it’s what we know. We stay because we can’t imagine another way.

So we put up with the lies. The abuse. The broken promises, promises. We push aside our intuition and let the situation control us, instead of the other way around. Eventually, we find ourselves two options: stay or go.

Not an easy decision, but a necessary one.

Today, I stand at this crossroads. I can stay comfortable (and unhappy) where I am. I could journey to a new (scary and unknown) place.

I don’t know what to choose.

Without sharing too much, I’ve been in this situation for a long time time (over a decade actually). Many aspects of the situation are excellent, but a few key areas conflict with my personal values. I can choose to overlook those few things and just focus on the good, but that makes me feel like a fraud. I don’t want to lie to anyone, especially myself.

So here I am, between a rock and a hard place. I don’t know what I’m going to choose, but I do now this—I need to make a choice. Because as those three little women sang all those years ago…

“You do, or you don’t. You will, or you won’t.”

Sometimes, you need a dance party.

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The past two weeks have been crazy busy. My stress level was on 10, y’all. Today at work I felt like my head was going to explode. 

And then, I heard ‘Boyfriend’ by Justin Bieber. 

Y’all might be thinking, “Welp, let me get a mop to clean up the head explosion. If she was on the edge before, surely Biebs gave the final push.” 

NOPE. Turns out what I needed to alleviate my tension was a full-fledged, no shame in my game dance party. So that’s exactly what I had. 

I body rolled in my foyer. 

I twerked on my refrigerator. 

I pop, locked, *and* dropped it in the middle of my living room and it felt f*cking fantastic. I feel so much better and am ready to conquer the last day of the work week. 

Now if you’ll excuse me, Missy Elliott just dropped a new video and I have more booty shakin’ to do.